SNOOOORRRRTTTTT

Capt. John Cunningham, one of Spirit Airlines’ finest pilots, railed the entire line off of the woman’s chest. She giggled in amusement as the large black man blinked his eyes and dabbed at his nose with his finger.

The Houston hotel room was cramped, dingy, and shook every time a plane took off. It was a straightforward room with two queen beds, atrocious carpet, and a questionable smell.

This is what flight crews get when their shut down for “rest” between trips.

“Beauty!” yelled Capt. Derek McDonnell, who sat in a chair across the room. A different woman sat on his lap still wearing (most of) her flight attendant uniform.

“Woo!” Cunningham exclaimed. “We need that shit before every match!”

The two pilots were still in their dress pants but were now lounging without the pilot hats, dress shirts or jackets.

“Ugh, we need something.” said McDonnell, who nodded in agreement. “We beat everyone last season, then completely choked at Gold Rush.”

Cunningham shook his head and laid down next to a naked flight attendant on one of the hotel room’s queen beds. He looked up at the ceiling, closed his eyes and placed his hand over his face in distress.

“Well, listen my dude,” Cunningham mused. “We’ve been in worse shit before. We still got jobs, we still got fun, and we still got Season 2.”

“I got a message from Commissioner Meloche,” McDonnell informed his partner. “We’re up next week against a new team in the organization. They call themselves Bounce Squad.”

Cunningham sat up straight and laughed out loud.

“Ha! What’s their shit about?”

“They’re local titty club bouncers,” replied McDonnell, who pushed the flight attendant off his lap and stood up. “They’re protection for that Vicky girl.”

The two women they were with weren’t even paying attention to the conversation; they were back on their phones texting or scrolling through Tik Tok.

“Oh shit,” exclaimed Cunningham, as if remembering something. “I wonder if they saw her interview with us last season.”

McDonnell grabbed another beer out of the minifridge, sat back down in his chair and tapped on his lap for the flight attendant to rejoin him. She made her way over, sat down and nuzzled her face into his neck. He grinned in response.

“Don’t worry bud, Season 2 is going to be when things really take off.”

Cunningham hopped off the bed and grabbed a beer for himself. After popping the cap, he extended the neck of the bottle to his partner.

“It sure is.”

The bottles tapped together with an audible clink sound.